open windows

as it is a sunday night
we had worship
and since i played in the praiseband
i was supposed to show up at the church at 4:30

i was talking on the phone with my MeMe when it dawned on me i only had 15 minutes to get ready and be there
so i quickly ended the call, packed my stuff, and headed to my car
i was pleasantly surprised when i found a decent parking spot on campus
and got out to get going

upon looking at my watch and realising two minutes wasn't enough time to drop off my stuff at the loft and get back to the church,
i decided to be a couple of minutes late
which is ridiculous because if you know me, you know kayla does not like to be late
even for things that do not require precise timing of presence
like loading the worship stuff in the car
but that is not the point

i got back to the church and walked around back to find jonathan's santa fe in the parking lot
but no people were anywhere to be found
so i tried the door thinking they must be inside,
but the door was locked
and so was the other door from the parking lot
i grabbed out my phone and called maddy
no answer
i started to call jonathan,
but then maddy called me back

"are you at the church?" i asked as i answered
"yeah, we're here. we're trying to get in," she responded
now, since the school year started,
(what? like two weeks ago?)
this was not the first,
nor the second,
but the third time i had been locked out of that very church
"ohkay," i said, my wheels turning as i tried to figure out how we were to get in, "let me call tafta."
so i dialed the phone and tafta answered.
"hello?"
"hey, this is kayla"
"hey"
"we're locked out. are you at the church?"
"no"
"is maggie at the church?"
"no"
"ohkay. i'll talk to you later. bye"
"bye"
around this time, mads, jonathan and noah came around the building
i informed them tafta was not here and offered no other solution to our predicament
they informed me the organist was playing inside
mads suggested we bang on the door until the organist heard us and took pity
i stayed at the back door in case someone walked through

it quickly became clear to me that neither of these options were a valid solution
considering we were getting nowhere with either of them

so i walked around the building with a passing thought about climbing in a window
and met jonathan along the way
after peering into one of the sanctuary windows,
we again went to the back
assessing the situation, jonathan said
"the door is locked and we have no key"
"i wonder if all of those windows are locked?" i responded, mostly thinking to myself
i climbed down the embankment as found myself along a ledge
"wow, this is much higher than it looked like from up there"
but i jumped down and found myself in front of an unlocked window to the basement
with a little nudge it came open
"jonathan, the window is open" i called "come here and help"
jonathan appeared from around the building
"do you have the window?" i asked after passing it off to him so i could pull the blinds up
"yes"
around that time, noah joined us
and as i worked on the blinds, the window came down on my head
"ouch," i laughed
"sorry, it slipped," jonathan apologised.
"it's cool, i have the blinds. you have the window?" i asked again as i was gearing up to climb through
"yes"
with that i started through the window
at first, the drop to the floor did not seem like a big deal,
but all of a sudden i was shrieking as i slipped off of the sill
i landed rather hard on my back and found myself staring at the ceiling
a chorus of
"did you just fall?"s
and
"are you ohkay?"s
rang out from above
i took a moment to contemplate my status
the fall hurt
but i was [mostly] ohkay
and we were finally in

after a couple of "i think it's funny your only logical solution was to climb through a window"s
i got to thinking about how representative this story is of my life

i am constantly told things are impossible,
or i'm simply not capable of things,
or  whatever else,
but there's always an open window

and yeah,
i may get hit over the head with it right before falling through and questioning if i'm ohkay,
but somehow things always work out

so the lesson here:
when the church is locked 
and you have no key
find the open window

never without you, music

i came home from a full day of lab late last week,

a mind full of infrasound, flight ladders and soldering.

i decided to check snapchat.

Parachute had an extended story,

which of course i had to watch. 

a contest had been announced. 

the challenge: making a playlist (so naturally i was ALL ears) of songs you could never live this life without

the stakes: potential for a personal acoustic session (a chance to hear Be Here live) via skype (but also a tangible reason to create another one of my playlists = reward enough).

the details: see social media (or directly below) 

needless to say, i started on the task immediately.

within an hour, there were 23 songs on the list, and i was distraught. 

how was i supposed to narrow down a list of 23 songs i couldn't live without to only 10? 

after some painful removing and rearranging, 

i present to you a 10-song playlist, with a 2-song encore:

1. Without You - Parachute (2016) 

Explanation                This song has a particularly special place on this playlist (seated at number 1) because it is the reason for this playlist. (It's their new single. I approve.) Aside from that, it is a song of love at first site; a song of being so sure of something right away. There’s a hint of sass (always, always, always a plus), it is light-hearted and so much fun. Want to dance around your room while listening to Will Anderson say he could never live this life without you? Yeah, me too. This is my-our, our song (not the slammin’ screen door, staying out late…you get the point).

Notable Lyrics            When they tell you that you can't do that; but you will and you know you're gonna like it

                                    We were always gonna get too close; We were always gonna fall in love

2. Come On Eileen - Dexys Midnight Runners (1982)

Explanation                This was probably the first song I ever heard, as in my mum would play it through headphones on her tummy when she was pregnant with me. If you’re not satisfied with that explanation, it’s almost certainly one of the catchiest songs ever, don’t even lie to yourself.

Notable Part                Roughly 2:55 – 3:35. oh, how do I explain it? Maybe as a Taylor Swift style spinnin’-like-a-girl-in-a-brand-new-dress kind of feeling? Those moments when you let everything melt away and spin in circles with your arms stretched out to the build up? Does nobody else get that way at this part?

3. Sweater Weather - The Neighbourhood (2013)

Explanation                You know, if I could explain the obsession with the song, I might have been able to overcome said obsession in the past three or so years. And ask anybody who hangs around me for any amount of time, it isn’t even just the original version of the song that makes me feel all cosy inside. Like, I have a playlist that has my five favourite versions of Sweater Weather on it. I listen to it on repeat sometimes. It’s a problem, I fully acknowledge that.

Notable Lyric              I don’t mind if there’s not much to say; sometimes the silence guides your mind

4. Clocks - Coldplay (2002)

Explanation                 I’m not even sure this song needs justifying, but I will try. Imagine a girl trying to breath, but everything going on around her is sucking the oxygen out of the air. She shoves headphones in her ears and all of a sudden, a piano starts playing in a repetitious, yet soothing melody; something on which to focus all of her remaining energy. It pumps life back into her surroundings and captivates her in the transition.  She finds herself both floating on the clouds above and putting her feet back on the ground below simultaneously. By the end of the song, her breathing has steadied and there is a solution to the problem. Yeah, I don’t know, it has a pretty impressive effect on me though.

Notable Mood            an indescribable calm (see above) 

5. Be Here - Parachute (2009) 

Explanation                Have you ever listened to a song and knew the artist just…got it? I’ve blogged about this song (be here: a response), I’ve clung to this song through some really hard times, and I’ve had multiple conversations with friends about why this song means so much. Articulating it is hard, it’s just right.

Notable Lyric              She swears that she’s made with a heart that won’t break 

6. Wide Open Spaces - Dixie Chicks (1998)

Explanation                As an introverted earth scientist, I think the main attraction here is the undeniable duality. Wide Open Spaces. Sometimes you need wide open personal spaces, sometimes you need wide open outdoor spaces, and sometimes you need to touch the earth as the only one for miles and miles. Also, this song was basically everything I wanted to be as a child, so there’s that.

Notable Desire            independent wanderlust

7. Say When - The Fray (2009)

Explanation                 It’s a story told through a collection of stream of consciousness thoughts. It’s like the moment your breath gets caught before you finally get what you’ve been dying to hold; like the pause before the beat drops dramatically in a song. And the arrangement matches the mesmerising lyrics so well. I’m quite fond of the vast majority of the Fray’s work, but I return to this song often.  

Notable Lyrics             We’re heading straight for it; might get it

                                    You’re in the song playing on the background

                                    Maybe God can be on both sides of the gun

8. Change - Taylor Swift (2008)

Explanation                 Hope (even though it is a four letter word). I mean the song starts with and it’s a sad picture, yet somehow we end up in the midst of a revolution. It’s an overall good-feeling, I-can-do/overcome-anything song. Plus, it’s freaking Taylor Swift. Nobody is surprised she ended up on this playlist.

Notable Response       She wears a white dress and is taking control of her world

9. Love Song For A Savior - Jars of Clay (1995)

Explanation                 I always picture myself in an open grassy meadow decorated with wildflowers and surrounded by trees. Jesus and I are dancing around barefooted as the sun’s rays (aka the Father) warmly smile down into the clearing. It’s a peaceful activity; a place where no one in the world can disturb the quality of the time.

Notable Lyric              As close as a heartbeat or song on her lips

10. I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) - The Proclaimers (1988)

Explanation                 I could never live this life without travelling --> Roadtrips are the most life giving form of travel --> A roadtrip is not a roadtrip without jamming out with the windows down to 500 Miles --> I could never live this life without 500 Miles

Notable Desire            A roadtrip (obviously)

a. Say My Name (Feat. Zyra) - ODESZA (2014)

               Explanation              The last time I was in England, I went to an EDM club. I had fun, but I decided electronic music wasn’t really my thing. Shortly after, this song was the free single on iTunes, and everything changed (my hardcore study time is now almost exclusively electronica, and I study a lot). I can listen to this song on repeat and not get tired of it. It’s good for getting ready; it’s good for studying; it’s good for everything. And it’s vulnerable, yet overly sure of itself. I love a good paradox.

               Notable Lyric          ‘Cause you got my hands tied in my defence; I always fall for confidence; your compliments look good on me

b. You Really Got Me - The Kinks (1964)

               Explanation             The 60s, especially the second half, is (are?) probably my all-time favourite period of music. We have The Beatles and The Beach Boys and Bob Dylan and The Who and Jefferson Airplane and Creedence and The Temptations and I could really go on forever (at the least a very long time). You Really Got Me is an incredibly representative [of the period] and repetitive song, but it ends and you find yourself wishing it hadn’t, thus it’s appearance in the encore.  

               Notable Response    Air guitar! Air drums! All of the air instruments! 

 
  

so thanks for humouring me.
i clearly spent an excessive amount of time on this playlist and post.
and i feel no shame whatsoever.